My Mental Health Looks Like This

I wrote this a while ago and I thought I would share. Hope it helps. I love you because I love you.

My Mental Health Looks Like….

Author: Fredrika M Sellers

This can’t be life right now. I went from being able to handle what was coming my way to crying at the drop of hat for what I thought was no reason. This happened within a span of a couple of months. During the day I would go about my business and at night when everyone else was asleep I was up in the bathroom silently crying and not understanding where the tears were coming from. This happened on a consistent basis and I was masking it as I was just tired and that once I got a fair amount of sleep that it would stop.

Then the unthinkable happened. One day I was at home, and I just started to cry and the next thing I knew I flung my cell phone across the room. Tears streaming down my face and everyone looking at me in shock. Not knowing what to do, I grabbed my cell phone and walked to the Starbucks where I sat in silence for at least two hours contemplating why I had that type of reaction. It was then that I decided to act and get the help that I desperately needed.

In the black community, seeking therapy and counseling is not spoken about out loud. We have been trained that there are some things you just don’t talk about. “Keep this in the family”. “They don’t need to know all our business.” And my favorite “Just pray about it. It will go away.” Listen, let the record show that we do pray. But as the bible says “. faith without works is dead” (James 2:17).

What does my mental health look like? At first, it was a complete and total mess. Then I recognized that I needed to do more than pray. I sought help from a therapist that I still see to this day. What we don’t realize is that we suppress memories thinking that it will heal us doing that. Suppressing how we feel is damaging to the heart, mind, and soul. My mental health is improving. It is not an overnight miracle. I am digging deep into my past and confronting those painful issues that were surfacing at night when my mind was racing. I am forgiving those who have hurt me from my childhood and adulthood. Why? Because I deserve peace and joy and love. I deserve to be free from pain. I deserve to smile all the time like everyone else.

I encourage you in this article to examine what your mental health looks like. Break the stigma that you shouldn’t talk about it. You have the absolute right to heal from every painful event that ever happened to you. It’s okay to say you are not okay. The first step in healing is acknowledging the pain you feel. What people don’t realize is that your mental health affects your physical and spiritual health. And for every negative memory you face, replace it with a positive outcome for it. Recognize that you are becoming stronger every single day. Remember you are needed, you are wanted, and you are love. Don’t let the fear of others keep you captive. You walk in your freedom.

Contact your insurance company to see if mental health is covered. Research therapists and if needed psychiatrists in your area. Schedule your first intake interview and let them assess what type of help you need. Once that is done, I recommend seeing them as often as you need to. This is your healing process. It’s not a bad thing to seek help. It’s empowering.

This is what my mental health looks like.